Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Langit tetap hening di kejauhan,
kala matahari melara bintang yang telah padam,
tapi syukurlah angin menemukan kawan seperjalanan
tanpa meninggalkanku di belakang.
(Friday, December 11, 2009 at 11:15am)
Tak ingin ku bertanya
kepada langit yang digantungi awan,
kepada matahari yang menyilaukan,
kepada bintang yang ditelan malam,
selama angin-anginku tetap di sana
meniup pergi kegelisahan
(Saturday, December 12, 2009 at 6:52am)
Aku ingin bernyanyi
mengalahkan desir angin
dan mungkin sesekali
(Thursday, December 17, 2009 at 6:57pm)
Thursday, October 15, 2009
takut keliru aku jika menafsirkan
menjalar dan kembali
berulang dan rupa-rupanya
tak dapat kami sangka
pun hitung percuma
ya, kami cuma manusia
(Thursday, October 1, 2009 at 11:35am)
Ingin ku berlarian di tengah hujan
bukan tuk meratapi diri, kawan
aku ingin menantangnya
dan takkan menyerah
meski angin pun mendukungnya
aku juga tak menyangkal
dingin hujan dan angin memang
membuatku menggigil dan pusing,
tapi aku takkan kalah di peraduan ini
Kini mentarilah yang menantangku
untuk menggapai awan yang tinggi
dan lebih dalam lagi
mencium wangi daratan baru
mendengar nyanyian pulau baru
ya, aku takkan pernah ragu
tuk membentangkan mimpi lagi
sehingga kami bisa berbagi langit
dan melukis pelangi
(Thursday, October 8, 2009 at 8:43am)
Kenapa hujanmu tak kunjung reda,
dan terus kau bisikkan
di sela alirannya?
Padahal, beranikah kau yakinkanku
bahwa kenanganmu akan pelangi
kini bukan bayanganmu belaka?
(Tuesday, October 27, 2009 at 10:20pm)
Aku ingin melihat sahabatku tertawa selalu
bersamamu aku kira itu akan terwujud
sebagaimana kau pun yakin akan sosoknya itu
bisa terus menghangatkan hatimu
tapi tiada cerita dan cerianya lagi untukku
sebagaimana rakusmu mengisap pancaran sahabatku
untuk menerangi semata jiwamu
tak apalah jika denting tawanya dan dentang gelakmu
ku percayakan kepada cinta dan tanggung jawabmu
tapi yang ku lihat kini hanyalah pilu
(Tuesday, October 27, 2009 at 11:00pm)
Monday, October 5, 2009
Agnostics are not as fierce as the atheists. They’re just apathetic about God’s existence, and religion as well. Probably, they never consider to think about these issues. But once again, it doesn’t make them awful persons. They are humans—we are humans. We already have the mind and heart to be good. It’s our nature.
Both atheist and agnostic are not abstruse, if you spare your time to look at this world from their perspectives. Don’t call them abnormal, because abnormality is relative. When we think that they are abnormal, that’s exactly what they think about us too.
As long as they do no harm to us, we have no reason to abhor them, much less to abolish them. It’s much better if we can live side-by-side with people who have different perspectives since it would broaden your insight as well.
(in this article, we refer to those who believe in God and religion)
Sunday, September 13, 2009
I found it in the Urban Dictionary site. Well, I've cut the part mentioning "melody" to refer music stuffs.
1. The name of the most beautiful girl in the world.
2. A pretty, but very short asian girl who becomes a spaz (gugup) when she is near her friends. But everyone still loves her.
3. A girl so obsessed with her appearance she marries a plastic surgeon to guarantee a lifetime of free plastic surgery.
4. The cashier behind the counter often confused for a boy since her hair is short.
5. The awesomest sissy (banci) ever
6. Union of man and beast
7. The coolest most beautiful girl in the world. She gets like almost every single guy in the world, and knows how to do it too! she is sexy, and has the best style ever. Her name is music to every guys ears. She is practically friends with everyone and hates or dislikes no one. She is gorgeous inside and out, and has the most beautiful hair. She has a great family and lots of friends who all love her so much!
8. A skank (cewek sampah tukang ngobat) who wears clothes too tight for her.
9. A person who thinks she's hot but is not.
Monday, August 24, 2009
Using only song names from ONE ARTIST, cleverly answer these questions. Pass it on to 15 people you like and include me (presuming I'm someone you like). You can't use the band I used. Try not to repeat a song title. It's a lot harder than you think! Re-post as "my life according to (band name)"
Are you a male or female:
My Beautiful Woman
Like a Child
How do you feel:
Describe where you currently live:
If you could go anywhere, where would you go?
Your favorite form of transportation?
Your best friend?
Safest Place to Hide
You and your best friends:
Larger Than Life
What's the weather like:
I Want It That Way
Favorite time of day:
Everytime I Close My Eyes
If your life was a TV show, what would it be called:
You Wrote the Book on Love
What is life to you:
Climbing The Walls
What is the best advice you have to give:
Quit Playing Games
Thought for the Day:
Boys Will Be Boys
How you would like to die?
Your soul's present condition:
The Answer to Our Life
What Makes You Different Makes You Beautiful
Thursday, August 20, 2009
I haven’t read the saga since it’s a saga. There are four volumes, and each of them are THICK. No doubt they are expensives and take much time. And it’s a saga so that you can’t just read one of them—you have to read ALL of them. So even though I really love Buffy the Vampire Slayer (it was a very popular TV show in the USA—makes me wonder if they really adore vampires that much), I’m not eager to read the saga. There are too many factors to be considered.
Then I saw this new title—The Host. The synopsys in the back cover tickled me.
Melanie Stryder refused to fade away.
Our world has been invaded by an unseen enemy that takes over the minds of human hosts. Most of humanity has succumbed. When Melanie—one of the last remaining humans—is captured, she is certain it is her end.
An alien invasion? That is cool. Takes over the minds of human hosts? That is awesome. It reminded me of my favourite serial when I was young—Animorphs by K.A. Applegate. It’s about five teenagers fighting against a similar alien invasion. It’s full of action and the characters are so lively. I was hoping to taste it again in The Host. That’s why I decided to dig in my purse and bought it.
As I told you, I haven’t read the Twilight Saga at all. I didn’t know that Meyer is very melancholic. She explores her characters’ emotions deeply. It’s good. Really. But in the end, that’s what it’s all about. No hunting. No shooting. No fighting. NO ACTION. The aliens are souls and they are mild. They’re even afraid of any kind of violence. They are honest and kindhearted.
In the middle of reading, I felt like Man, it’s boring. No hearbeating. No adrenaline rushing. The story flowed so slowly. The characters moved only in very small scope. When will you guys save this world? When will you send those aliens back to their home? There was no clue. I was heartbroken. I stopped reading it for a few days, but then I continued reading it. I’ve bought it after all.
As I read it, I realized that Meyer’s strenght is not action. It’s the way she told us about universal values of life. The story is not black and white. Meyer guided us to see from the eyes of both humans and aliens. She also showed us that among them there are friendship, trust, approval, even love.
Yes, love. That’s why the Twilight Saga drives people crazy, isn’t it? The Host will not disappoint you if this is what you’re looking for. There were complicated loves—beyond your expectations. This love grew unexpectedly, craved upon your heart, and there is no way you can explain it. But if you’re looking for some actions, forget it.
My conclusion is, it’s not that bad. I’m looking forward to reading the sequel—if there will be any. But I hope there will be more action in it. Cheers =)
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
"Cheadle stars as Samir Horn, a Sudan-born American who has gone to work for Muslim extremist groups, using his weapons expertise to help execute attacks all over the world. Charged with tracking him down is Roy Clayton (Guy Pearce), an FBI agent who, for some reason, is conducting an international investigation. He sends Samir to prison early in the film, but thanks to the help of his friend Omar (Said Taghmaoui) and some buddies on the outside, Samir escapes from the Yemen prison and starts planning a series of terrorist attacks that target Americans." (http://www.cinemablend.com/)
There are 3 tags that made me yearn to watch this movie: terrorism, Muslim extremist groups, CIA. I mean, okay, so this should be a fascinating espionage thriller movie--my favorite! Actually, I was worried that this movie will lead people (esp. western) to misjudge Muslim community. But it turned out to be a fair story.
Samir Horn was a son of a very good Muslim, and Roy Clayton's father and grandfather were priests. Nobody speaks of any religion negatively. Even when Roy's friend started to make jokes about the Muslim extremist ("He's ready to go to heaven to see 72 angels."), the dashing Guy Pearce gave equal sample about Christian ("My neighbour burned himself with a cross... Seems like every religion have their own rituals.")
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Kupikir aku tahu warna langitku
dan jumlah bintangnya
Tapi langit itu kelu
begitu pula aku
dan aku tak siap
ketika hujan bintang tak terhitung
karena dulu berusaha menghitungnya
dan mengatur pancarannya
Bintang-bintang pun menembus atap rumahku
memberi ruang bagi mentari
dan berkata lembut,
langit selalu bersamaku
dan kau memiliki aku
Hujan Bintang 2
Setelah hujan bintang semalam
pagi ini kupunguti bintang-bintangku
satu demi satu
cemerlang atau redup
Aku belum bisa
memasangnya di langit baru
hari ini, mungkin lusa juga
Mentari muda pun tersenyum
langit kan selalu ada
tak perlu kamu terburu
Hujan Bintang 3
telah cemerlang lagi
meski memang masih tercecer di sini
karena belum kutemukan langit baru
terdengar bisik sang mentari,
tak perlu terburu sayang
selama kau masih di bumi
aku pun setia menemani
Friday, July 24, 2009
When I’m playing Travian,
I know that
I’m wasting my money,
I’m wasting my time,
but I’m not wasting my life…
1. Video game sudah lama dianggap sebagai perusak generasi muda. Berbagai macam sisi negatifnya telah diteliti dan disampaikan kepada para orang tua. Para dewasa muda pun tidak luput dari wanti-wanti ini karena tidak sedikit di antara mereka yang masih sering bermain video game. Sayangnya, hanya sedikit orang yang mampu melihat sisi positif dari bermain video game. Bahkan, para pemain umumnya dan pencandu khususnya hanya membiarkan diri mereka larut di dalam permainan. Mereka tidak menganggap permainan itu sebagai bagian dari pengalaman hidup yang dapat diambil hikmahnya.
Pluto adalah manga psikologis fiksi-ilmiah. Ceritanya cukup berat dan keras dengan sasaran pembaca dewasa (remaja akhir juga bisa). Latarnya adalah masa depan ketika teknologi robot sangat canggih sehingga ada robot yang menyerupai manusia. Tokoh utamanya adalah seorang detektif robot buatan Jerman bernama Gesicht yang bekerja untuk Europol. Cerita dimulai dengan terjadinya serangkaian pembunuhan misterius. Orang-orang yang terbunuh ternyata berkaitan dengan Tim Investigasi Bora yang dikirim ke Persia beberapa tahun sebelumnya.
demi menggurat hujan
kala kupinta temu
sebelum warnamu pudar
tapi terlalu cepat ia angkat kaki
terpaksa awan-awan kuarak lagi
hujan kali ini
bagai menikmati tari
apakah ia mencibir?
pelanginya ada dua!
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Hope, optimism, and future-mindedness
You expect the best in the future, and you work to achieve it. You believe that the future is something that you can control.
Sprituality, sense of purpose, and faith
You have strong and coherent beliefs about the higher purpose and meaning of the universe. You know where you fit in the larger scheme. Your beliefs shape your actions and are a source of comfort to you.
Creativity, ingenuity, and originality
Thinking of new ways to do things is a crucial part of who you are. You are never content with doing something the conventional way if a better way is possible.
Judgment, critical thinking, and open-mindedness
Thinking things through and examining them from all sides are important aspects of who you are. You do not jump to conclusions, and you rely on solid evidence to make your decisions. You are able to change your mind.
Curiosity and interest in the world
You are curious about everything. You are always asking questions, and you find all subjects and topics fascinating. You like exploration and discovery.
*YLI = Youth Leadership Indonesia, established by McKinsey&Company Indonesia and consists of Indonesia’s (future) leaders.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Last week was my baby brother's birthday either. He is 7 years and 7 days old today. One week before his birthday, I'd given him a nice kids science novel (actually, I got it free from my lecturer, but please don't tell him). I hope he would consider it as his birthday present, at least until I'm home (still 10 days ahead).
Well, these stuffs make me miss my home so much, even if it is similar to "the burrow"--home of the Weasleys in Harry Potter series. I just have to work harder then. Fight!
This is one of my current favorite manga (Japanese comic), Rocket Man by Motohiro Katou. I've just started reading it sort of 2 months ago. I picked it up because I really like Q.E.D. C.M.B. by the very same author. Both of them are mystery mangas, with low-profile yet unique main characters solving unexpected mysteries.
Rocket Man is a bit different. It's still a mystery, but with more espionage scents. The main character looks very lousy--a very ordinary shy 13 years old skinny boy named Mizunashi. The only thing special about him is his lost memories before he's 10 years old. Suddenly he met 'R'--a foreign guy who then revealed to be a spy from True Eyes. TE is an organization that even CIA can't stop. Its business is 'true information'.
Soon Mizunashi's world changed into sets of unexpected and staggering secret missions. Moreover, this lousy boy slowly discovered his awesome potentials!
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Talking about priority, in the last 3 weeks I encountered some challenges about priority. I’d been in an internship for about 3 months when my boss (coordinator, actually, but yes she is my boss) asked me to choose—to continue my internship (and maybe start teaching on the next semester) or to focus on my future graduate study.
I wanted to stay there until my graduate study begin (which is more likely in Sep 2010), but she insisted that I had to choose. Okay then, it’s about priority. So I gave up on my internship. My deepest desire is to be able to study and learn constantly. Yeah, until I die. Somehow giving up on my internship means I can spend more time enriching myself with knowledges—yes, I can study (and play) more often. Ultimately, I don’t regret it at all.
Actually a week before the insident happened, I’d signed a contract to translate a book. The book is thicker than those I’ve had before. It’s a challenging work and the fee is worth the same. Moreover, by translating it, I can improve my english skill—especially vocabulary and reading (yes, my weakness in the last TOEFL test). Thus this job really fits me. Working and studying in the same time, I love it.
The problem is there were other jobs (another translation, internship, teaching). I sighed to my mother that I had too many things to do. Just the next day I found out that I had to give up on my internship. Wow! It was a direct answer from Allah (and I love You so much!). I could not give up on my other translation. I’d promised to my client to finish it, so I had to do it. This is also what it means by PRIORITY.
Don't forget that I’ve signed a contract to have classes twice a week during last month. I had to go to my students’ office which is very far from my lodging room—kind of wasting my time. However, I said I’ve signed a contract. I couldn’t just say goodbye. I had to wait until the contract is over. A few days ago I got offered to carry on 4 sessions more with higher price. But I said NO. I’d already decided which one is my priority—my translation job. I don’t want to disappoint this nice publisher.
It’s not even over yet. There was another translation selection from a prominent publisher (prominent yes—but not as nice as the publisher I’m currently working for). No, it’s not my priority. So I handed it over to two of my friends. I hope one of them will get it. This week I also received a call from my former student. She asked me whether I can teach her (or her friend, I’m not sure) again. No, it’s not my priority either. So I told her that I’ve already had a job. Then I handed it to my friend. In the very same week, my undergraduate lecture sent me a message. He said that his friend need his novel to be edited. Hmm… is it my priority? No, it’s not.
Of course I wanted to be greedy and took them all. But I know my capacity. I understand my priority. If I insisted to work on all of them, I would get nothing but chaos—disappointing many people. I believe that I’ve done the right things and have made the proper decisions. I hope I will be able to do even better in the future.
That’s what I’ve learned lately =D
Saturday, June 6, 2009
indeed i know you're busy
cuz the future is near
we can't stuck in one point
and me, yes me
looking at you that way
yet you pushed me further
to my own near future
because me, yes me
will go away too
without looking at you
just let it be mine
mine to protect and nurture
but even though it is human nature
I won't give up
and for everything that I've got
there's only smile
even if it is not enough
sometimes I could laugh
truth is such a dance!
but for you...
no need to reveal the real one
the time will come
so just let it run
Friday, May 29, 2009
According to Wikipedia site, there are 25 wars from 2003 until now. Some of them are still on going. Discrimination also exists in all over the world. Sometimes they develop into wars. What happen to this world? What things are we lacking so that wars erupt so easily?
A war might occur from the inability to make an agreement that satisfied both sides. In the same time, we have to keep in mind that people will never be satisfied. Mr. A agrees on something after understanding Mr. B’s conditions. Mr. B should do the same thing to Mr. A too. Discrimination comes from people who can’t understand why others are different from them.
In the worldwide context, this understanding means global understanding. How do we achieve that? Realizing that the world consists of different people from different cultures, my suggestion is by strengthening multicultural friendship and partnership.
Multicultural is widely described as a term that includes people of all races and ethnic groups (Figueredo, 1993: 32). Multicultural friendship and partnership means friendship and partnership between multicultural people. In the progress, there shouldn’t be any domination from any side. Each person should be able to bring up their cultural identity and view freely without hesitation as long as he/she doesn’t humiliate others.
The college youth can take great part in this case. Since they are in the state of developing themselves, it will be easier for them to implement new things in their life. But, despite of the well-developed technology that enables us to make contacts with anyone in other parts of the world, why are we still lack of understanding?
Well, saying hello and a little chit chat will not make they understand others multiculturally. They have to experience it themselves through student exchange program, long-term multicultural correspondence, or multicultural international project. Each of them can give students chances to improve their cultural empathy, open-mindedness, emotional stability, social initiative, flexibility, and self-efficacy (Van Oudenhoven, Jan Pieter).
In student exchange program, students live in a new environment with different norms and habits for one or a half year. It doesn’t only allow them to learn foreign language, but also to learn about other culture very closely at heart. By having friends from other cultural backgrounds, they will learn to see the world from different perspectives. They will know how to interact better with people from other cultural backgrounds. Increasing the numbers of student exchange program will help more students to be like that.
Not all students have the chance to experience student exchange program due to financial account and opportunities. The long-term multicultural correspondence is cheap and simple. Students can use the internet to do this from their home country. The correspondence should be intensive and emphasizing global issues that will stimulate different cultural views. Sharing these kinds of thoughts will broaden their mind and understanding. Learning an issue by discussing it with your friend will remains longer in your mind rather than seeing it on the television. Of course the students would be more motivated if the colleges and universities make this correspondence obligatory.
The multicultural partnership could be actualized from multicultural international project. Students from different countries (ideally from different continents) gather to do a project, such as running business or children development volunteer work in a developing country. They will have a chance to work together as a team with students from other countries. They will also learn many things from the host country society.
Those experiences will lead students to build full personality. In the end, they will be people with global understanding. We can also expect them to have positive contributions to the world. It is because their experiences and knowledge support them to figure out how to make resolution and peace-building needed for conflict. If we have more people like this, we have one step closer to the world without war and discrimination.
“Community Development Volunteer Work.” 20 March 2009.
“Culture War.” 20 March 2009.
“List of Wars 2003 on.” 20 March 2009.
Ahida, Ridha. “Justice Concept in Multicultural Society Seen from John Rawls and Will Kymlicka’s Perspective.” Doctoral Dissertation, University of Indonesia. FIBUI: Depok, 2005.
Bennett, Chritine I. Comprehensive Multicultural Education: Theory and Practise. Boston: Allyn and Bacon, 1986.
Cifuentes, L., and K. L. Murphy. “Promoting Multicultural Understanding and Positive Self-concept Through a Distance Learning Community: Cultural Connections.” 20 March 2009.
Figueredo, Danilo H. “Developing Media Collections to Serve Multicultural/Multiethnic Communities.” Multicultural Acquisitions. Ed. Karen Parrish and Bill Katz. New York: The Hawarth Press, 1993.
Hirst, Paul. War and Power in the 21st Century. Jakarta: Murai Kencana, 2004.
Kahn, Joel S. Culture, Multiculture, Postculture. London: SAGE Publications, 1995.
Sunarto, Kamanto, et al. “Multicultural Education in Indonesia and Southeast Asia: Stepping Into the Unfamiliar”. Journal of Indonesia Anthropology (2004).
Van Oudenhoven, Jan Pieter. “Predicting Multicultural Effectiveness of International Students: the Multicultural Personality Questionnaire.” 20 March 2009.
Monday, May 25, 2009
It is stated by a character named Nagato in one of my favorite manga (Japanese comics), Naruto written by Masashi Kishimoto. This manga's essential message is about peace and the dreams to accomplish it. The story is still on going. So the the truth of the message is still unrevealed. But how the characters struggling to seek for peace and their own dreams encourage me to seek for my own.
It feels funny as thinking about how I've been learning about faith. I learned from books, comics, movies, friends, even video games.
Comics? I bet some of you'll be surprised. Comics are not all about fun. I read mangas a lot. And lately I'm reading great mangas that teach me so many things in life.
Another favorite manga of mine is Bakuman written by Obata Takeshi and Ohba Tsugumi. The story is about two boys (from 9th grade and now 11th but still on going) fighting for their dreams--becoming prominent mangakas (manga writers). It is such a powerful story that I can feel their spirit and strength when pursuing their dreams.
Both mangas have young main characters. In the beginning, they're just ordinary kids with a piece of dream. And then they grew up so much that many people acknowledge them. How did they do that? Talent is something but it only gives small contributions. The most important thing is they have faith.
When you have faith, you believe in yourself. You will do your best to make your dreams come true. You won't let anything make you down. And you know that you will make it eventually.
So having a dream is how you start it. Then put your faith in it. I knew it because I'm doing it. Trust me =)
Sunday, May 24, 2009
(A few days ago I've had a beautiful correspondence with my friend as I wrote the note "Starting My 20s". I want you to check this one out ^^)
I know you have some anxiety about starting your 20's, but this is the best part of your life. You are young and in your prime, but old enough to be smarter, have a better idea of who you are and what you believe in, and you can also do more things and explore more of life than you could as a teenager. This is the time to travel, explore, and meet new people! Don't worry about things - everything will come into place, you will see. Here is a quote for you which is one of my favorites:
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did so. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
So don't be scared, just be excited! I am sure many good things await you Melody :)
Christina… thank you sooo much for your beautiful message ^^
I received many supports lately, and I’m so glad to have yours today.
As writing the note (starting my 20s), somehow I felt like releasing all my fear. I’m growing stronger day by day ever since. Maybe writing it was some kind of therapy for me.
Now I feel grateful to know that I’m able to start my “life” earlier and with more opportunities than most people in my country. And yes, this is time to travel, explore, and meet new people. Next week I’m going to submit my scholarship application to study a master degree in
And yes, everything will come in place. My cultural environment is a bit tightening but I won’t worry about it anymore. I’m free and I will flee.
Peace and Love,
I found this question under my friend’s picture in his blog. A friend of him said no way, but I disagreed. I believed that it rape could happen to men either, but I didn’t have much to talk about it. So I kept thinking about it as I recalled some related experiences.
I remember watching a movie from India (probably it’s a bollywood movie, but I’m not sure) when I was in primary school. There were a group of women who had been raped by a certain man. They gathered to make revenge. One day they kidnapped the man and did a surgery to him. In the next scene, the man told his friend that he lost his penis. The women have cut it.
I can’t recall what happened next. Maybe I went to school after the scene. I was 9 or 10. I understood what had happened but I didn’t understand how critical and interesting the movie was. It wasn’t a rape, but still it is about women do something to man sexual organ.
It reminds me of a TV seri from Colombia titled Paquita. This smart beautiful woman somehow got married to a movie star—Casanova type. I said “somehow” because they didn’t seem to love each other (the film was a bit complicated). They never made love until the end of the seri.
One day the Casanova disappeared. When the Casanova came home a few days after his disappearance, he told Paquita that he’d been kidnapped by 8 women. He said that they raped him. Surely Paquita didn’t believe him. He was Casanova! Not long after, Paquita found out that the Casanova had cheated on her with an actress. So they got divorced.
I watched it when I was in the first grade of Junior High School. Even now I can’t decide whether it was a rape or not. In fact, I’m not sure that the Casanova had really been kidnapped. He might have just gone out with his girlfriend. Possibly even if he really had been “raped”, he enjoyed it. What will a greedy cat do when we give him 8 fresh fish?
Another incident crosses my mind. There was this tall handsome guy named Bryan McFadden—the most favorite member of an Irish boyband Westlife. One day as he entered his hotel room, he found two naked young women. Those women desired to make love with Bryan. But Bryan got angry and asked them to get out.
I read about it in a teenage magazine in the same year when I watched Paquita. Bryan McFadden was no Casanova. He was modest and low-profile. He even had low-esteem when he had been younger. Maybe if there were more women, it would have been a rape. Maybe.
Currently my mother told me about a new talkshow run by Desi Ratnasari. The guest was a mother and her son. Since senior high school age, the mother used to force his son to make love with her. Now the son is 26. His face showed us that he felt humiliated. In contrast, his mother showed no sign of guilt.
The mother said she had been doing it because her son reminded her of her late husband. When the son was asked why he had not run away, he said that he had been afraid to be neglected. He had been afraid that he wouldn’t be able to make his own living.
The audiences were college students. They shouted at him for being such a loser, “Even a garbage collector can make a living!” My opinion was more or less the same. He has graduated from a vocational senior high school. He could have worked in a car service and sleep there!
But then I was thinking of another possibility. The son might have been mentally weak. As in a book titled A Child Called It, it was very difficult for the child to think that her mother had been a bad person that treated him so cruelly (in fact, she had). Well, I’m not a psycholog, so it’s just a possibility.
My mother also told me about what had happened in her hometown. A junior high school boy had been forced to make love with his aunt. It had been used to happen years until he’d entered high school. He was underage—a minor. Yet the local court claimed his aunt not guilty. My mother said it was because in her village, people would listen to the older one.
I felt sick as listening to that story. What about the boy’s rights? They just didn’t notice it. As what happened in the Desy’s talkshow, no one had sympathy on the victim. Even though they were male, they were weaker. What people have in their mind is men can rape women because men are physically stronger. So it is impossible for women to rape men because men are created to be physically stronger.
Then they forget about boys—younger, weaker, and less independent than men. Then they forget about mentally weaker men. Or maybe it’s as simple as a bad woman gives a sleeping pill to a good man and then rapes him. So my answer is yes, a man can be raped by a woman. But this lack of understanding explained-above makes people less aware of what happen to men and boys around them. In consequence, such cases were revealed years after it had been started.
Finally, all I want you to bear in mind is please pay more attention to your environment, your society. It’s not impossible that something wrong is going on around you, but you don’t notice it when you should have. Men or women, boys or girls, young or old—nobody is immune to any kind of abuse, even from their closest persons. If you find anything suspicious, tell the police. Let them check it while you keep yourself unnoticed.
(I guess I’ve made many language errors. If you notice some, please tell me)
Saturday, May 23, 2009
He said that nobody speak English in Indonesia. This is bad for Indonesian people’s carrier, and Indonesia’s carrier itself as a country...
I have two young men from India as my students. They’re learning Indonesian language from me. I discussed with one of them (Mr. T) about languages in India. I’d always thought that English is their national language. But he said it’s Hindi. But they’re speaking both English and Hindi fluently. He told me that all schools and offices in India use English. And Hindi is okay to live side by side with English.
Well, it’s only one piece of information from one man. I dare not to say that it’s completely true. But now they’re learning Indonesian language fast. It shows that they’re not unfamiliar with acquiring foreign language. And that’s a positive thing.
Mr. T also gave me his opinions on Indonesian people English ability. He said that nobody speak English in Indonesia. This is bad for Indonesian people’s carrier, and Indonesia’s carrier itself as a country. If our people can’t speak English, it will be difficult for foreigners to communicate with us. In consequence, fewer foreigners interested to invest in our country. It was also told by my previous student from Korea. The inability of Indonesian people to speak English properly makes things more complicated when foreigners investing their money in Indonesia.
English is getting more and more vital in this global era. Fortunately, Indonesian schools have shown a significant improvement. Some of them are opening international classes. My sister will start her junior high in an international class. I doubt that there are enough English-speaking teachers for all of them. But this is a good sign. Our people are getting more critical about education so that schools are getting more careful in linear.
After all, Indonesian language should remain important. Rarely I find someone speak Indonesian well. Even some foreigners speak Indonesian better that most of Indonesian people themselves. Thus I shall remain you once again that language is one nation’s identity. Furthermore, a strong language indicates a strong nation (it is related to soft power, maybe we’ll talk about this later). Indonesian people have to be able to speak Indonesian as a part of Indonesia. They also have to be able to speak English as a part of the global village. So let’s go internationalize ourselves while bringing tremendous national identity as well ^^
This is how I learned that starting a dream is as easy as thinking I want to be like him/her! out of the blue. Well, I’ve proved myself once...
I should have started working on my translation but my friend Yuki started her blog so I just can’t wait to make my own new entries! There are so many ideas running over my head that I can barely choose what to write down first. I guess I will start on the most recent one.
I’ve just seen this talk show called KickAndy! Tonight Andy interviewed some young successful men—most of them are well-educated. My first reaction was oh, I wish one of them were mine! Hahaha. But soon I thought of a much greater thing—I shall be one of them!
I’ve spent the last 6 years avoiding becoming a leader. Sub leader was okay but I didn’t want to be on top. I thought that it’s exhausting and I wasn’t capable of it. I valued myself so low that I forgot what I had done. During my last year in junior high school, I was a leader. I pushed my friends to make a monthly school magazine. It attracted many attentions—my schoolmates, teachers, even alumnus. I remember how I felt at that time—I was cool. Haha. But I did no such leadership thing after graduating from junior high. I was too afraid of facing people, encountering problems, and the worst—my own presuppositions.
However, the last few years also has taught me about making dreams come true. When I was a freshman in the university, I had to sing in the graduation ceremony (well, all freshmen did). There I witnessed how the name of the youngest cum laude graduate pronounced. I thought that it was cool and I wanted to achieve that too. The problem was I wasn’t young enough. I knew that there were a few younger freshmen than me. So in order to widen the possibility of accomplishing this goal, I tried so hard to finish my undergraduate study in 7 semesters. And I did it. There were some sickening obstacles and things to be sacrificed, but I did it.
This is how I learned that starting a dream is as easy as thinking I want to be like him/her! out of the blue. Some people do think that I’m crazy, that it’s just some kind of phantasm, and that it’s way too high for me. Well, I’ve proved myself once. I was the youngest cum laude graduate. I had my name pronounced in the main hall and written in the two national newspapers. Then why not doing it again? And again?
I have guts and strong will. God has shown me a glimpse on the way. And I’m not afraid of walking on it. All I have to do now is to work (look for money) and study as hard as possible. Both of them will be my key ingredients for my next year targets.
After all, just like my friend Naana said, I’m Miss I-can-do-it :)
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Well, I found out that if I got sleepy, I should eat something. Whew, it’s costly and I might gain too much weight. Ha-ha.
Got to work again now. See ya ^^
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Today was nice with a little silly bad news in the end. But I won’t let myself down because of it. No way. Thus I won’t tell you about the silly bad news, ahaha...
This morning I attended a four session seminar on linguistics. The first speaker was the current Netherlands Ambassador for Indonesia, Dr. Nikolaos van Dam. He spoke about Arab-loan words in Indonesian language. His lecture was in English. I can catch every words but I can hardly remember them. Most of the audiences were lecturers. So I felt like having a class in graduate degree, ha-ha.
The second speaker was Dr. Anton Moeliono—rival of my professor Dr. Harimurti Kridalaksana. During my first years in the university, I thought both of them had already died. Then suddenly I had Dr. Harimurti in my course. And today was the first day I saw Dr. Anton alive. He spoke about multilingualism, polyglots, and their impact on Indonesian language.
The third one was Dr. Uri Tadmor from an anthropology institute. He was attractive. Listening to him speaking Indonesian was no boring. Strangely he gave me different impression when speaking English debating. He told us about the implication of loan-words in Indonesia on the archipelago’s history recognition. He exposed some remarkable facts and stories about how and what other languages have influenced Indonesian.
The last one was Dr. Jérôme Samuel from Paris. His paper was about the word “sepuh” (temper)—how it developed into various meanings. It was very analytical that I got sleepy during his speech. I knew I shouldn’t since I’m going to study in graduate degree but I couldn’t make it.
It was raining after the seminar. My friends asked for my help in a Portugal poetry reading and music. Actually I would have had a class this afternoon but it had been canceled. So I helped my friends and got a tip and two nice books in revenge. Meanwhile all I’ve done was welcoming guests and eating snacks.
I also got another reference letter from my lecturer Mr. F. And I met my lecturer Dr. M who works in the university main office. She told me that I might be able to ask for school fee payment suspension. So there’s a possibility for me to start my graduate study this year on September in University of Indonesia. But there are so many consequences I have to think about. What about Hawai’i, Australia, and Leiden? And that I’m still yearning to study at Cardiff? Studying in Indonesia self-funded will be crazy. I’ve experienced studying and working in the same time and how I wish it wouldn’t happen to me again!
Well, I’ll be thinking of it tomorrow. Now I have 12 pages to work on. Yaaawn, English again. No time to stop studying :)
One of my projects got cancelled until August and I didn’t know how to feed myself until then. So the book project dropped by when I needed it badly...
Yesterday was wonderful. First thing in the morning is my friend Y had her thesis defense successfully. She got her defense early in the morning that when I got there in the campus, she’s all alone, even her supervisor was still on his way. Even though I was jus an insignificant help, I’m glad that I came. She got so many things in her hands to be shared at that time.
Then I got my Fulbright reference letter from my lecturer, Mr. U. I can’t wait to get my TOEFL test result on Friday so I can finish my master degree scholarship application. I still have to ask for one more reference letter from Mr. F though.
I went to a publisher for a translator test. It took longer than I had expected but the result was great. They trusted me both to be a translator and an editor. In the same day, they directly give me a book to work on. The book is not easy but the payment is way finer than my previous projects in other publishers. The best thing about this publisher is they forgave my late response. One month ago, they had sent me an email responding my application, but I just had figured it out a few days ago. Such a big fish I’ve almost missed!
The next thing was I had to go to Tanah Abang directly. I had a class there on 04.30. Two times I had to take ojek (motorcycle cab) to minimize the time but thanks God I didn’t come late. One of my students refused to keep studying in the last ten minutes but it wasn’t a big deal. My way home was average. I just got confused a little in Pasar Minggu and had to pay the last minibus with coins since I got no more small cash with me.
One of my projects got cancelled until August and I didn’t know how to feed myself until then. So the book project dropped by when I needed it badly. When I told my friend, she said, “God never sleeps.” I guess it’s true. If He sees us fighting for our good, He will help us somehow. But I said to my other friend that, “If we do something good, good thing will come to us.”
Last week I also joined a selection for translating a young adults fiction in a different publisher. I've just received an email about the result. I failed the selection but this time I'm relieved since I've already got a bigger project in my hand.
From now on, I got so busy that I won’t be able to write many. But working hard is fun when we’re expecting some money from it ;)
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
I have to thank you for every single thing you’ve done, for every laugh and tear. Even our conflicts and enmities are not less valuable...
I wrote this last night when I was already sleepy but wanted to write something in the same time. This afternoon my friend had her undergraduate thesis defense. Some of us accompanied her before the defense, and then we waited for her (peeking, chuckling, gossiping, joking, and trying to take her pictures) in front of her door. It was a great time. Sadly, it also reminded me that it was one of our last times together.
There were hard times, ups and downs, disputes, and achievements. We learned to see who’s who and each other’s position. We’ve been through so many things during the last four years. And I tell you this, you helped me to grow up—something I had not been able to do in my previous environments.
I have to thank you for every single thing you’ve done, for every laugh and tear. Even our conflicts and enmities are not less valuable. You showed me how to be a friend, how to deal with life, and how to make jokes (ahaha, I’m still not good at it lol). Every single one of you is complementary--including those rarely had contact with me. After all, the best thing is we’re not friends like those in the televisions. Us is us… with some funny lines ^_^
One of the reasons why I’m still here in the campus after graduation is I don’t want to lose you too soon. I want to see the leaves fall one by one while carving your names in my heart. The Time will always run forward and the Distance will eventually play its part. Yet we may not get stuck in this point. Let’s run along with the Time and laugh at the Distance. We’ll become bigger and stronger, and then realize that there were “us” somewhere between the long journey.I love you guys ^^
Monday, May 18, 2009
yet you shed your tears in front of me
I’d thought you knew everything
yet you gave me no grip
I’d thought you would always be there
yet you left me with only me
Later I realized that
you're not a superhero,
you're not a professor,
and you're not a god
You’re just someone older
struggling to make our life better
for this so-called unconditional love
we’ve sometimes doubt of
Now I have a few words to say
Let’s grow up together starting today
along with our little ones
we’ll draw much brighter lines
(this poem is dedicated to my mother...)
I had to figure out how to prevent their interferences in my facebook life...
Yesterday my facebook friend B complained in his status that one of his friends had deleted him from his/her friend list. I offered him a possibility that it was simply because he/she might just doesn’t know him personally. But B insisted that they know each other and he knows every single person in his facebook friend list. Actually, he was wrong. We don’t know each other. I had mistaken him for other friend with similar name in the same school and he believed me to be one of his almost forgotten English course old fella. Haha, hey Mr. B, please don’t delete me since we have many mutual friends, let’s just be friends from now on ^^
It reminded me of some cases where removing someone from the friend list happened. The first time it happened to me was done by a girl from USA. I just wanted to make friends with her. I thought she wouldn’t be afraid to someone looks like a little girl like me (oh, really? Hahaha). But she deleted me after a brief chat. I didn’t mind at all. I had already understood that parents in the USA and Great Britain always warn their children about having friends in the internet (trust me, I’ve read loads of young adults novels). Now I have some friends from other countries and we’re doing okay, ahaha.
First time I delete someone from my friend list happened a few months ago. He was Mr. A and I don’t know him personally. He added me from my neighbor’s account. I thought he’d wanted to be my friend since he commented several times on my status. But then I teased him on something and he got mad. He shouted at me. After leaving a little “I’m sorry” message, I deleted him. Whew. In fact, I deleted him directly to avoid him deleted me earlier. Ahahaha.
The second one was Mr. R in disguise. Well, we never really had a relationship, but I admitted that we were close. When we “broke up”, I swore him that it was my last message. He didn’t use his real name when he added me. There were no personal picture, only cartoon and various kinds of coffees. Then when he said, “Hi, M. This is me, R,” As reading it, I wanted to scream. Despite of his marital status, I’m still afraid of him until now. So I reminded him that my “last message” was really meant to be one. Then I deleted him *sigh*. His last words were “conceit cannot be beaten even after years”. Ooooh, I don’t care. I was afraid >_<
Lately I found myself feeling uncomfortable with some of my friends in facebook. But I realized that it might become such a pain (= problem) if I deleted them. So I had to figure out how to prevent their interferences in my facebook life. Suddenly my friend H disappeared from facebook. He deactivated his account (but then came back in a few days). That’s when I found out the “settings” icon (yeah, my facebook knowledge development was slow). Since then I set the privacy settings, especially blocking my status updates to be seen by those persons. I can also stop any kinds of notifications about them in my home. Sometimes I also block particular notes from particular persons. And no more facebook notification emails (I let a few still though).
Fewer disputes follow less contact. Now I have a more peaceful facebook life. Please have a try :)
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less...
It was told by my senior (also Indonesian studies alum, thanks so much, i love this quote ^^). In fact, starting my 20s is chilling me. I've been through difficult times during my late teen ages. Now I'm 20 and have a bachelor degree title. I have to look for money and look for a way to pursue higher degree. And the most important thing is to look for my self-actualization!
My other senior told her friends about her being in the quarter life crisis. My friend told me about the disadvantages of being a woman. My lecturer told me about how adults might went crazy (literally!) due to their fiasco in life (esp. carrier and money). Damn, all of these stuffs make me goosebumps.
Another senior said that I'm too young to be right. Maybe he's right. Somehow my academic life has hampered me from growing up normally (I said me, so I'm not representing my whole friends with similar condition-those 20 year old holding a bachelor degree title). So I guess I need to take a break and start learning everything again...
Wish me luck ^^
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
I hope people will put greater good upon their tribal/group interests, for the shake of our nation, our country, our society...
Sunday, March 29, 2009 at 9:49am
When I was very young and naïve, I believed that Indonesia truly had “unity in diversity”, that differences are common and accepted. But then there was the 1998 riot and other ethnic or religion turbulents. It broke my heart. If those differences only create disputes, raves, even riots, better we have no difference at all!
I’ve thrown away my Javanese identities. I don’t need any tribal identity. I’m Indonesian, that’s all. I rejected when my mother said, “You are a Javanese!” (you are, mother, not me), stopped asking my friends cultural background, and started being neutral in any cultural discussion. But I understand that for most of Indonesian people, being Indonesian cannot be separated from tribal identities. Yet I hope people will put greater good upon their tribal/group interests, for the shake of our nation, our country, our society.
Imigrants always face discrimination—that’s not fair. But nowadays Chinese-Indonesians are not imigrants. If discrimination still exists—it is done by VERY selfish, stupid, and narrow-minded people. When I was in junior high school, I figured out that one of my Chinese-Indonesian friend loved Indonesia more than I did. Now I think that anyone loves Indonesia is my family, anyone respects Indonesia is my friend, even despite of their nationality.
Btw, forgive me for using the term “Chinese-Indonesian”. It’s just how to express a clear context.